DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize