just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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