he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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