the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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