We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
