dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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