everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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