This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
