U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
