When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize
