Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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