Porn is love you can see.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize