No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
