I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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