Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
dude i'm inner monologue high
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
