no, he came in my armpit
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize