Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
