its not stalking. its research.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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