I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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