My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
It's blow job season.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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