so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
