Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize