PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
