i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
