47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
