Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize