Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
