lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Randomize
