I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
