Me too!
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
