come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
