those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
