Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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