that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
