from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
