As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
