just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Randomize
