farters have to be the big spoon...
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
