i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Randomize
