A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
