I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
