Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
