Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
