So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
