i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Non-Jews are for practice
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
