Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize