i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Randomize
