I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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