So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
