She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
