Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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