It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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