All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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