after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize