But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
